09.PERFECTLY RIGHT FROM WRONG

I’m celebrating the birthday of my beloved, Brian.  He’s a borderline circus-act tall, honest, brilliant, I-can’t-catch-my-breath-from-laughing-funny, steady, handsome man.  He’s sharp and say-it-like-it-is.  He is kind.  He loves deeply.  He does dishes!  He’s a wonderful father.  The man could put baby-talking to dogs on his resume—he’s that good.  He’s the unreasonably fit, nonchalant guy who says things like, “Hey, I’m going for a quick run” and comes back 8 miles later.  Like it’s no biggie. Yeah, THAT guy. #swoon

In the near quarter century we’ve been together, I’ve often marveled at the many things that went exactly right for me to find this treasure of a man. But really, an awful lot of things went really WRONG for me to find this treasure of a man.  I owe my bliss today to the things that didn’t work out the way I planned or hoped. 

When I met Brian, my closest childhood friend was fighting for his life and ultimately lost the battle.  I was struggling.  And those struggles helped me forge a deep connection with the tall guy who lived in the apartment across the parking lot from mine, at the University I didn’t think I would attend, studying a career field I didn’t even know existed when I moved there.  I promise I had no idea I’d be a Midwestern soccer mom twenty-three years later.

We spend most of our adult lives pursuing the next right choice so we can set ourselves up for success.  The reality, though is much of our success, our biggest wins, and achievements, doesn’t come from doing everything just right.  Lots of it comes from failing and experiencing adversity of all kinds.  In all the twists and turns, we wind up winning from our losses.  Experiencing hardship can help us relate to others, identify our purpose, find meaning, and yes—even open our hearts to lasting love. 

You know I’m a big fan of gratitude and counting our blessings; but let’s not forget to count our heartaches, too. Think of all the ways your life had to go a horribly wrong before it got just exactly right.  What gut wrenching break-up, devastating loss, silly mishap, terrible accident, or unfortunate error brought you the bliss you have today? 

And if you’re going through one of those painful life experiences RIGHT NOW…hang on!  Chances are there’s someone or something mind-blowingly good just across the parking lot.

Cheers to you, my love!  I’m truly grateful I found my way to you.

Rachel